Psalm 103

I love Psalm 103, so much that I committed to memory verses 1-5 a while back. This morning I was reading and meditating on them again, but I decided to attempt memorizing the entire Psalm. Verse 6 says:

"The Lord works righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed."

The question rose to my mind "Do I really believe that?" Consider the suffering inhabitants of the world that are dying in starvation, disease and oppression. The suffering is overwhelming to me. Elizabeth Smart didn't ask to be abducted by that polygamist nut-case while sleeping soundly in her bed one night. My son didn't ask to get cancer at age 2. My sister didn't ask to be held down in scalding water when she was 3 and bear the messy scars on her legs to this day. And it's the age-old question, isn't it, 'If God loves the world, then why is there so much suffering?' Well, I don't know. I just don't know. I understand the root of it is sin, but the flowering symptoms of this diseased plant are so awful I can't bear to think about them.

Sharon, my Godly friend, always challenges me to read the Word, believe the Word and to walk in the Word, even if I've never seen some of the things I read about. So that is the grid through which I read verse 6 this morning. I have to read this verse, believe it and walk in it, even if I haven't seen it with my own eyes. I must trust that God WILL work righteousness and justice for all who are oppressed, either in this life or the next. If I disbelieve or disobey this, then I am disbelieving and disobeying God himself.

God, help me believe!

Oh, crappy day, crappy day...

Not quite a song, but it's how I feel tonight. I have had the strangest of days, feeling kinda lonely, though I've been surrounded by people all day. How is that? The weather was gloriously sunny and warm, very crisp and clear. Those 2 things combined usually make my heart leap with joy. Okay, yes, admittedly, my quiet time was weak sauce, spent time looking at stuff about scripture, but not really feeding off the Word itself. Maybe that's it, maybe I'm just hungry.

The Cost of Discipleship

Recently in my sunday school class I was telling about the horrible feeling that comes over me as I drive to the Brenau campus and eventually have get out of my car. Many of the students there are determined to believe that I am a homo-phobe and bigot because I was firm with a so-called believer for living in homosexuality. Many are disgusted with me and I know it. I can see it in their faces when I'm around campus. I was being brutally honest and vulnerable in that admission.

The room sympathized with me and began asking questions... they clearly did NOT want me to feel badly or threatened in any way. After all, this is America! I understood that and it was sweet. But then I got all choked up with tears as I quietly, but firmly told them it was worth it. If I suffer for the Name IT IS WORTH IT! What an honor! Some people live their whole lives and never suffer for the cause of Christ and the scorn and ridicule that accompanies this faith. The perplexed, stunned looks I got were priceless. You would've thought I had 3 heads!

I am honored to be in the company of true believers who are willing to suffer for their faith. No, none of us are suffering to the point of shedding blood, but maybe we can work up to it, huh? I'm watching Missy and Angelo charge ahead for Christ in the midst of financial devastation. I'm watching Stacey do what she hates by staying home to take care of her home in obedience to God to respect her husband. I'm watching Linda stand firm in her commitment to marriage while her husband lives another life with another woman. I'm watching Jenn step up and offer alternative thinking to evolution to her students in biology class. And I'm getting a front row seat to watch God bless their obedience with lives being changed! They are making their bodies a living sacrifice... Praise God for faithful warriors!

Missy gave me a lead on this 39 year-old guy who was hung in 1945 at the hands of German soldiers at a concentration camp because of his faith. He wrote "The Cost of Discipleship" and you can find some excerpts of his writing here:

http://www.crossroad.to/Persecution/Bonhoffer.html#1

His name is Dietrich Bonhoffer. It's impossible to stay in a bad mood after reading some of his thoughts. I know this because I was in a bad mood but that changed immediately!

It just doesn't matter...

There's this perception that if you grow up in a family where the parents remain married, they take you to church, shield you from the worldliness of the world, never abuse you and care for all your basic needs - that you will be fine. Conversely, if you grow up in a home or homes where you are neglected or abused and never taken to the church building - you will grow up to be dysfunctional. But there is no perfect flow chart. God will do what God will do. He will have mercy on whomever He chooses. This is a great mystery to me.

Holy Shame Leads Us to Repentance

Watson continues to expound on the virtues of Repentance when he points out...

4) We must have SHAME for our sin.  This is definately not a modern idea.  At all costs we are taught to avoid feeling shame for anything we do.  Shame acts like a gauge to point us to Repentance.  Look again to scripture and how Watson expounds this point...(Ez. 43:10)

 a) Every sin we commit makes us guilty, and guilt usually breeds shame.  Until Adam sinned, he was not ashamed to be naked. 

 b) In every sin there is much unthankfulness, we have sinned against God when all He's given us are blessings and mercy. (Isaiah 1:2)

 c) Sin has made us naked & deformed in God's eye, stripping us of our cover of holiness.

 d) My sin put Christ to shame, He bore it all through the humility of the suffering of the cross.  

 e) Many of my sins are in league with Satan, a cause for shame.  He often stirs my passions.

 f) Sin turns men into beasts. (Ps. 49:12, Luke 13:32, Matt. 7:15, Job 11:12) God's image is defaced, reason is eclipsed, conscience stupified, a reason for shame.

 g) In all sin is folly. (Jer. 4:22, Prov. 14:18) Is not he a fool who labors more for the bread that perishes than for the bread of life? Or he that will believe a temptation before a promise?

 h) We should have shame, for the sin we commit is worse than the sins of a Heathen.  We act against more light, & against a clearer conviction because we have the oracles of God.

 i) My sin is worse than the sins of devils.  I should be filled with shame because I have examples to learn from; when they sinned, they were instantly damned.

 

  When you first read through this, how does it hit you?  I was agreeing with each point & at the same time realizing how often I try to set aside any feelings of shame.  To know God is to know He is full of GRACE, but to dive into the depths of this Grace, we must plummet to the depths of our sin & shame to know how much we need to be saved from.  Otherwise, we stay splashing around in the shallow puddles of grace with very little power or freedom.   

  Father, may we feel the conviction of Holy Shame & REPENT.

Confession as a Mark of True Repentance

  Being new to blogging, I'm finding it difficult to summarize such deep & meaningful truths in snipets that can be read quickly...alas I continue as promised.  But please realize these are minimal highlights from this teaching, and I encourage you to use this as a jumping off point to digging deeper on your own.

  Watson states that the Nature of True Repentance continues with the all important...

3)Confession of sin.  He emphasizes the brokenness of spirit that accompanies a passionate sorrowing.   The humble sinner does more than accuse himself; he, as it were, sits in judgement and passes sentence upon himself.  He confesses that he has deserved to be bound over to the wrath of God.  (1 Cor. 11:31)  

  Now that sounds brutally tough.  I am reminded over and over of the picture of Adam & Eve in the garden hiding from God, in contrast to the Prodigal and the reception He received from the Father.  So, do I tremble and hide at the thought of offending God, or do I run to Him for an outpouring of grace to save me from the wrath I deserve?

 

  Watson goes on to even qualify a right & genuine confession, so that we may truly know...

a) It must be voluntary (Luke 15:18) 

b) It must be with compunction, (Psalm 38:4) the heart must deeply resent it, it must be felt.

c) It must be sincere-the hypocrite confesses sin, but loves it still.  He is afraid of leaving it too soon.  A good Christian is convicted & abhors the sins he confesses.

d) It must be particularized, have to be specific. (Judges 10:10, Daniel 9:6) As when going to a doctor, to get the best diagnosis, all details are given; so it should be when we come to God.

e) It points to the source, that it is our NATURE; and not that we are good except for this thing we confess.  Out nature is an abyss & seminary of all evil, from whence come the scandals that infest the world. (Ps. 51:5, Romans 7:18-21)

f) It must include all its circumstances & aggravations, that we continue to sin in light of the gospel truth, is an offense.  Confess sin against knowledge, against grace, against vows, against experiences, against judgements. (Psalm 78:31-32)  

g) Our confession must so charge ourselves as to clear God, in His righteous judgements, He has done us no wrong. (Neh. 9:33)  

h) Our confession must include a resolution not to act them over again, it is vain to confess and continue on in sin. (Isaiah 1:16)  If confession is the vomit of the soul whereby the conscience is eased of that burden, we must not return to this vomit.  (This picture helps me!)

 

  This teaching on confession was NEW to me.  It is deeper than the "telling of wrongs" that I was exposed to as a child in the Catholic church.  It is so much more about the heart, and really examining ourselves in the light of God's standards.  A Holy Confession exalts God, humbles the soul, eases the troubled heart, purges out sin, endears Christ to the soul, makes way for pardon and shows our obedience.    

The Nature of True Repentance

  In an attempt to better understand repentance, I have been pointed to a 17th century puritan named Thomas Watson.  It has been enlightening to see what I have neglected in my spiritual walk out of ignorance; not for want of emotion, effort or distress.  Thought I'd share some highlights over the next week of the basics of what he says True Repentance is...

  Let's start with Watson's definition:  Repentance is a grace of God's Spirit whereby a sinner is inwardly humbled and visibly reformed. 

1) Have to SEE it as sin.  It is so easy to overlook the obvious.  If I don't see my sin the way God does and with the seriousness that He does, I am deceiving myself.  One must first recognize and consider what his sin is, before he can be duly humbled for it.  In the prodigal's repentance 'he came to himself' (Luke 15:17)  He saw himself a sinner and nothing but a sinner.  Where there is no sight of sin, there can be no repentance.

  Ephesians 5:8 For at one time you were darkness, but now you are light in the world.  Walk as children of light.

2)Have SORROW for sin.  The Hebrew word for sorrow translates better "to have the soul, as it were, crucified"  My sorrow for my sin must be more for offending God and making Him turn away from me, than for the loss or hurt of offending others.  (insert Steph. previous quote)

  Psalm 38:18 I confess my iniquity, I am sorry for my sin.  

  A true Pentitent labors habitually to work their heart into a sorrowing frame.  This sorrow is not superficial, it is a HOLY AGONY, scripturally called a broken heart...

  Psalm 51:17  The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit, a broken and contrite heart

  2 Corinthians 1:9 But that was to make us rely not on ourselves but on God who raises the dead.

  What has been my process of repenting in the past?  I confess it has been lacking the most important beginning of SEEING my sin.  If I can't see it, then how can I repent?  I am asking for God to open my eyes and reveal my sin to me, and then help me recognize it as sin!  The blessing of this, is the MAGNIFICATION of God's GRACE in my life!

 

Repentance

Isn't it strange to be a Christian all these long years and just now really be considering the importance of repentance? This will be a short post but I wanted to put up the quote Missy sent to us on Tuesday morning. I was just re-reading that e-mail and loved this:

"He that can believe without doubting, suspect his faith; and he that can repent without sorrowing suspect his repentance." Thomas Watson

First Post

Ok, girls. Here's the first post of ISI! Jenn, be careful what you ask for, you might just get it! There's nothing fancy here yet, so I'm hoping to figure out a way you guys can manipulate this blogsite too. I'll post more later, maybe in the morning after my God time.